My new book, SCARY DEAD THINGS, part 2 of The Tome of Bill is out!
Available for your favorite e-readers:
And stay tuned! As part of the Rule of Three blog challenge I will be posting a new original tale from the Tome of Bill here within the next few days. See you soon!
There are reasons we fear the night.
He STILL isn’t one of them.
Bill Ryder: programmer, gamer, and legendary vampire is back!
Six months have passed since a vampire hottie named Sally dragged him kicking and screaming (but mostly screaming) into the supernatural underworld. Since then he’s found himself hounded by enemies and frustrated by his allies. All that and he still can’t work up the nerve to talk to his dream girl. Little does he know his troubles are just starting.
A chance meeting halfway across the world plunges Bill into more insanity than he can shake a stick at. Now he finds himself a marked man in more ways than one. One of the most powerful immortals in the world wants him dead and an ancient vampire princess wants him for entirely different purposes.
However, that might just be the least of his worries as new and powerful forces have begun to emerge from the shadows around him. Are they friend or foe? Considering Bill’s luck, you can bet on the latter.
Bill’s only hope is to marshal his friends, master his powers, and muster enough attitude to stare down the very worst monsters the world can throw at him.
Can Bill survive and prove once and for all that he’s the scariest dead thing of them all?
If you haven't already, be sure to check out the Tome of Bill Book 1, Bill The Vampire
Available for your favorite e-readers:
Sep 18, 2011
Hello all! What follows is the chili recipe I documented on Twitter today under the #chili hashtag. This is my personal recipe. However, since I am neither a professional cook nor do I participate in many chili cook-offs, I see no reason to keep this private. A good chili should be shared with all! May its meaty goodness give you many hours of eating pleasure...
Ingredients: (note: I usually buy a bit more than I need...better safe than sorry :)
~3.5 lbs of meat:
1.5 lbs of chop meat. I prefer to grind my own from stew meat, but store bought is fine.
1 lb of beef (I prefer top round) cut into 1 inch cubes
1 lb of chicken or turkey, likewise cut into 1 inch cubes.
2 large (32 ounce) cans tomato sauce
1 small can of tomato paste (8 or 10 ounces)
2 quart sized cans or bottles of beef broth
1 Jar of beef bouillon cubes
2 jars of beef gravy or aus jus
Bottle of red wine. Cabernet or Burgundy. No need to go nuts here. A cheap $7 bottle of wine will get you where you're going. You needn't be a wine snob but if you don't believe me go ahead and drop $50 for a bottle of cooking wine. Just know that somewhere I am laughing at you.
Spices: Usually bought in bulk BJs or Sams Club sizes.
Onion Powder (can use minced onions if desired)
Garlic Powder (can use fresh minced garlic if desired)
2 bottles of Emerils or Tobasco green pepper sauce.
1 bottle of Frank's red hot sauce*
*Can substitute your favorite hot sauces for this. I once used a very good garlic hot sauce (forget the brand) and it was marvelous. However, I would recommend against either BBQ hot sauce or Chipotle sauces. Their tastes are fairly strong and will definitely skew the chili flavor.
Time to Cook (on stove): ~ 2-3 hours
NOTE: This isn't a crock pot recipe. It assumes you're either around to stir this mother constantly or that you like the taste of burnt chili. If you decide to go the crock pot route, this is easily an all day affair.
1) In a large sauce pot (1.5+ gallon capacity) add in the tomato sauce and the beef broth. Fill each tomato sauce can with water and add in as well (you'll need something to boil off). Add a healthy amount of chili powder, black pepper, and green pepper sauce to the mixture*. Toss in 1 beef bouilion cube. Turn on high heat and stir. Let it heat up and work on the meat.
*I just go with feel here. Know your own tastes. Going light is ok, you can always add more as this cooks.
2) Season all of the raw meat with the above spices. Feel free to get creative with your spicing, they don't all need to be the same. However, at minimum, Chili powder should be used on all of them.
3) Brown each of the 3 meats separately in a large frying pan with a cup of wine each. Add more spice as desired. Brown the meat slightly. Do not cook fully. Definitely do not overcook. As the beef and chicken cubes are finished, pour the entire contents (meat and sauce) into the main pot.
When the chop meat is finished use a slotted spoon to put the meat into the main pot. Do not put the drippings from the chop-meat into the pot. There's a lot of fat in it which you'll just wind up skimming out. Don't believe me? Fine, enjoy your fatty greasy chili.
4) Ok you have the base of the chili set up. Stir and bring to a boil.
5) Once it's boiling, any oil and fat should separate from the meat and float to the top. Skim this off and toss it. You may need to repeat this step a few times. You want as little fat/oil in this chili as possible. Trust me on this.
6) Turn the heat down to medium and cover the pot. Make sure to stir every 15 minutes for about the next hour. Every time you stir, take a taste. Add in more spice or hot sauce as needed.
Trust me when I say that you can add in a LOT of Chili powder, black pepper, Garlic, Onion, and Cumen without going overboard. The only thing I would be careful with is any hot sauce. Know your tastes and spice it up accordingly. If you have no idea what this means...maybe you should ask someone else to cook this chili for you.
7) After about the first half hour of step 6, add in another bouilion cube and one of the cans of gravy/aus jus.
8) After about an hour doing step 6, the chili should be reduced enough to start thickening. Dip a spoon in and see what happens. If the chili sticks to your spoon when you dip it in it's coming along nicely. If not, see steps 6 and 7 above.
At this point it's advised to turn the heat down to low and stir every 5 minutes for the next half hour. Make sure the meat is NOT sticking to the bottom of the pot or it will burn. The difference between good chili and burnt chili is about the same as eating chocolate pudding vs. a bowl of mud.
9) At this point the chili should be thickening up nicely. Start stirring continually. Since allowing it to thicken too much while on the flame can cause it to burn, I would recommend artificially thickening it the rest of the way. Open the can of tomato paste and stir it into the chili until it is fully dissolved.
10) If you've done everything correctly you should notice your arm starting to cramp up as the chili now has an almost glue-like consistency. If it does, then congratulations! You may turn off the stove and get yourself a bowl. It's eating time.
The remainder can be refrigerated for about a week or frozen until such time as the world ends and you need that extra bit of energy, that only a good cup of chili can bring, to fight off our machine overlords
Goes well with rice, cheese, and bread. Goes very well on hotdogs.
It also goes good with beans, so I hear. Of course this assumes you're the kind of weeny who digs that sort of thing. If so, don't tell me. You'll just lesson my opinion of you.
Enjoy with my compliments. Should you try this recipe, please let me know how it goes. If you like it, please share it with others. If you like it a lot, feel free to horde it and let the others find their own damn chili recipe.